Saturday, May 30, 2009


What I hate about June holidays........



  • Piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles of HOMEWORK!!!!!

What I like about the June holidays.......



  • Much more free time and use of computer and TV.

  • Vacations ( I dread! The only place we ever go is HK! I know many of you would DIE to go to HK but let me warn you, it is the WORST place you could ever go to, even worse than going to the toilet!) * I am obviously exaggerating but just to show how horrible it is........ ( If you are wondering since I hate it why do I put it under LIKE, since most of you think that vacations are wonderful, I just decided to put it under LIKE, as not to be the think-vacation-is-horrible person.)

  • Much more time to play with my hamster, Obama.

  • Watch TV and play computer games without hearing the continuous nagging of my mom!

  • Have friends over to play.

  • More outings and no EXAMS!!!!!

YIPPEE!!!! EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER!!!! REJOICE, CELEBRATE!!!! SIGH* STILL GOT SA2 AND NOT TO MENTION PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES OF HOMEWORK!!!!!! Why do we even live on this horrible place with horrible teachers, horrible homework, and not to mention horrible assessment books! The amount of stress is killing me!! Bye bye world! Whoosh! Piack! ( already committed suicide)

Thursday, May 28, 2009


Why Chinese shouldn't have Christian names:

Anne Chang = Dirty (Mandarin)

Anne Chin = Keep Quiet (Mandarin)

Faye Chen = Dusty (Mandarin)

Carl Cheng = Buttock (Hokkien)

Monica Cheng = Touching your buttocks (Hokkien)

Jane Tan = Frying eggs (Mandarin)

Henry Mah = Hate your mum (Mandarin)

Paul Chan = Bankrupt (Mandarin)

Nelson Tan = Bird laying eggs (Mandarin)

Leslie Tong = Rubbish Bin (Mandarin)

Rosie Teng = Screws and nails (Hokkien)

Pete Tsai = Nose droppings (Hokkien)

Macy Koh => Never die before (Cantonese)




Confusing chinese names!


Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!

Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.

Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller : Well.... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one)has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one)got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.

Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).

Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!


Sunday, May 24, 2009



The idiot test

  1. How many sides does a circle have?
  2. Spell your name...
  3. What shape is a roosters egg? a) triangular b) Oval c) Circle
  4. Why is Mas Selamat 2/3 woman??
  5. Why can't the skeleton go to the prom?
  6. Which direction would a pineapple drop from the tree? a) Left b) down c) right
  7. Why can't PM Lee go out in the morning??
  8. A mad person is stuck in a forest, which path can it take to get out?
  9. What is the time of coins called??
................................................................................................................

Answers:

  1. 2 sides, inside and outside!
  2. y.o.u.r. n.a.m.e.
  3. Roosters do not lay eggs!
  4. Because he is 1/3 man!
  5. Because he has nobody!
  6. Pineapples do not grow on trees!
  7. Because he is PM!
  8. The psycho path!
  9. Century!
Are you 100% idiotic??



Saturday, May 23, 2009


It takes 150 trees for an exam paper! Save the earth! Save the trees! Save paper! Ban exam papers and homework FOREVER!

Friday, May 22, 2009



My favourite places are...............................................................


  • My home as there is the computer, TV, comfy sofa and bed, my little hamster, Obama, and not to mention lots and lots of junk food and drinks!
  • The SPCA as there are many adorable pets that we can adopt!
  • Sentosa as there is the Luge and the nice sandy beaches!
  • Cinemas as there are many new exciting movies to watch and the screen is enormous!
  • Ice cream shops, any kind as I am a ice cream lover! Especially those with nice, creamy, delicious ice cream covered in chocolate sauce!

Thursday, May 21, 2009


Quiz!

OK, relax, clear your mind and ... begin. WELL, MAYBE NOT THAT CLEAR!

1. What do you put in a toaster?
...............................................................................................................

Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread," go to Question 2.

*******
2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?
...............................................................................................................................

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously over stressed and may even overheat.
It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more appropriate such as Children's World. If you said "water"
then proceed to question 3.

*******

3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?
................................................................................................................................

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks," what in the devil are you still doing here reading these questions????? If you said "glass,"
then go on to Question 4.

*********
4. Its twenty years ago, and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany(If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany.)
Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he has time and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany.
Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany or West Germanyor in "no man's land"?
..............................................................................................................................

Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else,
you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't bury the survivors",
then proceed to the next question.

*********
5. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on.
In Sweden, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmarthen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?
...........................................................................................................................

Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember your own name? It was YOU!!


P.S. Almost every one failed 95% of the questions! How about you??