Oh no!!!

Argh! Now there is a total of 701 swine flu cases! Let's flee! Run away! Ah well what's the point. If we have swine flu no school No homework! But there will be horrible nurses coming everyday to take blood tests and the hospital is the WORST place you could ever go to! So like I said what's the point.

Not homework

In case you are wondering Mrs Tay, Every thing posted on my blog, except for this is homework.

A very wierd movie

On some random day, I was watching the DVD Wolverine X Men origins. It was all right I guess. Well it is wierd in a way that there wasn't an ending, and when I asked my sister, she said the rest of the series were already showed and this is the first. I was pondering over the question , why would anybody play the last of the series first and the first of the series last. I mean like it totally does not make sense! Ah well I guess maybe that is how people like it. Sigh*

A wierd & informal letter

Dearest Amber,

I know you hate me and abhor doing any of the assignments typed up on my face, but it is definitely lovelier if I had your innocent handwriting scribbled on y sheet than the horrible and scary streaks of blood-red ink that your teacher scrawls across my belly. It is so painful to go through the "marking process" when your teacher whines incessantly and complains when you do not do well, or have not put in enough effort to write the words clearly, then she would be scrawling with her hard-handed handwriting, causing stashes and gashes across my nice clean face, originally a clean black and white. Worse still, she stamps these silly prints like that title with the words "try harder" on it. It may be embarrassing for you when your friends see it, but at least you can file me away and do better on the next sheet of homework. Spare a thought for me too! I have to have that imprint stamped on my head for the rest of my life. It is an incredibly tough life being a a homework sheet, you know. So I beg of you dear Amber, if you could do me a favour, please do your best work, so that I can be proud of you too, and proud of being in your folder without the other homework sheets laughing at me. I know you have a kind and compassionate heart.

Your piteous friend,
The English Grammar Book, page 2

Would I have liked to live in ancient Greece?

Obviously not! Firstly, the outfits they wear make them look like morons. There are no computers, televisions, Nintendo DS & Wii, and other electronics. Girls were always looked down on and not allowed to attend school. Girls were also always sold to work as slaves and treated unfairly by boys and men. There are also no luxuries and theme parks in ancient Greece. No ice rinks, no tennis courts, no arcades and no Sentosa! Must be very boring doing chores everyday, sewing and cooking. Well at least look on the bright side, no school! No homework! No teachers telling you what to do! But still, being able to live in Singapore is a very lucky thing, it is clean, safe and has a good prime minister. Besides the kia-suism, I think that Singapore is the best place you could live in.

Just a little poem about best friends

Best Friends

by Adrian Henri

It is susan I talk to not Tracey.

Before that I sat next to Jane:

I used to be best friends with Lynda

But these days I think she's a pain.

Natasha's all right to small doses,

I meet Mandy sometimes in town;

I'm jealous of Annabel's pony

And I don't like Nicola's frown.

I used to go skating with Catherine

Before that I went there with Ruth;

And Kate's so much better at trampoline;

She's a showoff, to tell you the truth.

I think that I'm going off Susan,

She borrowed my comb yesterday;

I think I might sit next to Tracey,

She's my nearly best friend: she's OK.

How to Torture Your Teacher

How to Torture Your Teacher

by Bruce Lansky

Only raise your hand when you want to sharpen your pencil or go to the bathroom. Repeat every ten minutes.

Never raise your hand when you want to answer a question; instead, yell, “Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!” and then, when the teacher calls on you,say, “I forgot what I was going to say.”

Lean your chair back, take off your shoes, and put your feet up on your desk. Act surprised when the teacher puts all four legs of your chair back on the floor.

Drop the eraser end of your pencil on your desk. See how high it will bounce.

Drop your books on the floor. See how loud a noise you can make.

Hold your nose,make a face, and say, “P.U.!”Fan the air away from your face, and point to the kid in front of you.

On the last day of school, lead your classmates in chanting: “No more pencils! No more books! No more teachers’ dirty looks!”
Then, on your way out the door, tell the teacher,“Bet you’re looking forward to summer vacation this year. But I’ll sure miss you. You’re the best teacher I have ever had.”

The End

How to Torture Your Students

How to Torture Your Students

by Jane Pomazal and Bruce Lansky


Start each day with a surprise quiz. Don’t dismiss the class for recess until you have finished the lesson you’re working on. At the end of the day, hand out a huge assignment that’s due the next day.

When a student says, “I have to go to the bathroom,” say, “You should have gone this morning before you left home” or “You’ll have to hold it in; it’s time for the kindergarten to use the bathrooms.”

Never call on students who have their hands up. Only call on students who have no idea what’s going on.

When a student asks you a question, say, “Look up the answer in a book.” Don’t bother to mention the name of the book in which the answer can be found.

When you read, go as fast as you can. Skip a line or two, then ask questions about the passage to see if the students were listening.

When it’s time for the students to read, call on someone who does not have a book.

When you hand out pencils, make sure they are dull and don’t have erasers. When you hand out books, make sure they’re torn and tattered.

When preparing the students fora test, write all the information they'll need to know on the board. Then stand in front of the board so they can’t see what you have written. As soon as you have finished discussing the test information, turn quickly and erase the board.

On the last day of school, handout a surprise final exam. Tell your students if they flunk it, they’ll have to attend summer school—and if they flunk summer school, they’ll have to repeat the grade.Tell them you hope they all flunk because you like them so much and you wish they could be your students again next year.

The End

Stalkers!

Being stuck at home, and not needing to go to school and for tuition is not as good as it seems. Firstly, The teachers will call you every morning and afternoon to ask lame stuff such as may I know what is your daughter's temperature. They are practically stalking us! It is not as if we have swine flu or what. Well there should be some good points too, such as no need to wake up so early for school. I think that is the only good point. Ah well! Why is the society in Singapore so kia-su? It is not like we are criminals that need to be locked up! By the way, Singapore already has 599 swine flu cases! Like Jing Ying says, lets run for our lives! But the problem is, to where? Now almost all the countries have swine flu cases I think. And plus Australia already has around 5000 swine flu cases! I guess it is impossible to prevent swine flu. Sigh*

Jokes

Laughter is contagious!

1. Five months pregnant and ravenous, Sarah decided a second helping of dinner. Of course, as soon as she spooned for more food, her husband had something to say about it. " Remember, I am eating for two," Sarah reminded him. " True," he said. " But how many are you exercising for?"


2. John is a safety- first kind of guy. But while vacationing with his friends, he was talked into going para sailing. He was getting hooked into the parachute when he nervously asked the pilot," How often do you replace the rope?" The pilot helpfully replied," Every time it breaks."


3. As Mary went out of the toilet, she looked rather bemused. Her handbag was considerably heavier than went in, even though she left it in an empty basin while she used the loo. Of course an automatic tap sensor is a new experience for her!

Argh!

Oh no! I can't even go out to shop, play or even eat just because I went to Hong Kong. I can't go for tuition and only can come back to school on Thursday. ( That is the good part) The only place I can go is tennis. Oh yeah and supplementary is suspended! Hurray! And also boo! Did you know that MGS has an extra 1 week of holiday? So lucky! sigh! Life is just so unfair! But the point is.... Singapore already has so many cases of swine flu, like around 365, so what is the difference if you go overseas? You can catch swine flu in Singapore, so why do we have to stay at home for seven days just because we went to another country? Then again, sigh!

Hong kong trip

While it was okay I guess. we went to ocean park and took a cable car to Lantau island although we have been there before. We went with my sisters boyfriend but he only stayed for three days and we stayed for six. On the first day we went to have dinner with my ye ye and aunties. We had pecking duck and it was delicious! I ate like 6 of them. Then we went to the street we always go called women street and I bought some stuff. There is another street we also went to which was called flowers street and I bought 4 sticks of fish ball for only $4. Each stick had 8 fish balls and it was delicious too! blah blah blah...... all the lame stuff is finally over, then we went to ocean park on Saturday. I wanted to go on Monday but my sisters boyfriend would have left so it was extremely crowded. we only went on 4 rides and there were hordes of people so we decided to watch the sea lion show and see the pandas. After that, we went to H&M a shop to shop. Most sections were having 50% off so I bought a jacket, a pair of shorts, flats and two shirts. blah blah blah again and then my sisters boyfriend went home because he had army. Later we took the cable car with my ye ye and his maid as he was wheelchair bound, we could skip the queue. The cable car place was called Ngiong Ping 360. at last we arrived at Lantau island. We walked around and then my sister, the maid and I climbed up 260 steps to reach the Buddha, where we took many photos. My ye ye could not go as there were no lifts and my dad had to take care of him. My mom was slacking and did not want to climb with us. For me it was practically just running up instead of climbing. When I reached the top, they were still halfway through climbing! I had dinner with my father's aunts and one was a scholar and the other is an actress. Impressive right? Days went pass and we went shopping and stuff like that. At last it was time to head home. I am so glad to step on Singapore soil again!