If I were a fruit...

I would obviously not want to choose but since it is compulsory, I think I would be anything that is inedible, for example a pong pong fruit. Since fruits do not have hands, feet, eyes, ears , mouths and lots more, thus they lead boring , pathetic and horrible lives. Not only do they get eaten up by animals and humans, all they can do is hang onto a branch and wait for the next wind to blow them down. Since they lead such unlucky lifes, the best thing that they can do is to poison all the unreasonable people like yellow skin, sissy liao and lots more. Pong pong fruits would at least not be eaten up by animals and humans unless that person or animal is a complete retard. I would at least spare the pain of being cut open or bitten into,unless a sadistic person came up to me and squished me with his mighty foot.

Blah

Stupid blogger changed the format now is so much more complicated and troublesome! And just so you now, the age limit for blogger is 13 years old! This means that it is illegal for us to have a blog account! If we get caught, we must blame it on Mrs. Tay. ( it is kind of obvious that we won't be found out but just for fun:B) anyways facebook does not allow either! hehe:)

What it means to me

" Good menners will open doors that the best education cannot."

Clarence Thomas

To me, it means that no matter how smart you are, there are many things in life that you cannot accomplish without good manners. For example, if you want to be a boss of a very successful company, you not only need to be well educated, you also have to be respected and well-like by your collegues and peers. To achieve that, you would need to be well mannered, courteous and helpful. If you are well educated, but not well mannered, you will neither be well liked nor respected by others, thus causing them to loose faith in you being the boss. To me, good education is like the soup, and good manners is like all the ingredients added to it to make it perfect. So, if you want to have opportunities far beyond what is given, you need to be both well educated and well mannered.

NDP Parade

It was a blast! I had so much fun! When we first reached school, I TOTALLY wasted my camera battery and took lame pictures of horrible looking teachers! Then we were off to take our freebies. The fun pack colour I got was pink! Eww! I absolutely detest pink! Then Melissa, the life saver, came over and ask me if i want to trade my pink bag for her yellow one, and kind of obviously I agreed, without hesitation. Then we took our Zinger burger which was EXTREMELY spicy! When we were on the bus, my strap broke! The quality of the bag was HORRIBLE! They should make it waterproof and more durable! Jing Ying offered to change with me as she got pink and I obviously agreed as my stuff in my bag was overflowing. Later we reached. It was scorching hot! My eyes were practically burnt from the heat! The stadium was crowded with many P5 kids and all of us was sweating profusely!( I could almost smell the sweat you know!) Ah well and there me and Jing Ying wasted our film even more. I got a balloon from a guy and then I loaned it to almost all the teachers that I could find from HPPS to take pictures. And then I take it back! I know I am mean but who cares! We wasted more and more battery because we were so bored and finally it started! The first few parts were OK I guess, but the people who parachute from the sky were really awesome! The people on stage with the eye were some media corp artist such as Michelle Chong and others. We did the Marina wave which I thought was really pathetic and then there were stuff like the fake bomb explosion and short plays. Soon, my camera had no more battery!! It totally failed me! Curse you camera! Time flew extremely quick that day. I was 7 pm! Can you believe it! I ate my Zinger burger and it was so spicy that every bite of chicken I took, I had to drink like a quarter of my precious H2O! The part at night was great! There were fireworks, nice performances and most importantly the rain! The performances were really entertaining and the stage was decorated very nicely. Then it was time for the fireworks. It was quite nice, and suddenly, the most dreaded thing came, the rain! At first I thought it was part of the show, but then it started pouring! The rain drops dropped down rapidly and strongly, hitting peoples heads hardly. I immediately took out my poncho. But there was something that I found out, the ponchos SUCKED!! They were not really waterproof in a way. But at least I was protected from the rain. Jing Ying and Gracia did not wear their ponchos. Ha ha to them. Soon the show ended and everyone was drenched from head to toe! There was like a flood and DIRTY water was gushing down the steps! It was like a mini water fountain! While walking to the bus stop, two retarded boys, Trevor and Samuel were skipping in the rain! I hope the reporters took a picture of them! Soon we reached the bus stop and we had to wait for like 15 minutes for the bus! Sofia, Wei Qin, Eva, Xinyu, Jing Ying, Gracia, Myra and I were like dancing lamely at the bus stop! It was quite embarrassing I must say, but who cares! The bus came and we, the filthy, drenched children, went on the bus. By that time, our shoes were filled with murky water, and every step we took we could hear the squish coming from our shoes! So many nice events, yet I couldn't get it down on tape! Sigh why did my camera fail me! Ah well we reached school and went home. The end of the wonderful experience just ended here! Sad:(

Pictures of teachers at the NDP ( For Mrs Tay)

Ah well there were many more but my camera went out of battery... sigh!

Oh no!!!

Argh! Now there is a total of 701 swine flu cases! Let's flee! Run away! Ah well what's the point. If we have swine flu no school No homework! But there will be horrible nurses coming everyday to take blood tests and the hospital is the WORST place you could ever go to! So like I said what's the point.

Not homework

In case you are wondering Mrs Tay, Every thing posted on my blog, except for this is homework.

A very wierd movie

On some random day, I was watching the DVD Wolverine X Men origins. It was all right I guess. Well it is wierd in a way that there wasn't an ending, and when I asked my sister, she said the rest of the series were already showed and this is the first. I was pondering over the question , why would anybody play the last of the series first and the first of the series last. I mean like it totally does not make sense! Ah well I guess maybe that is how people like it. Sigh*

A wierd & informal letter

Dearest Amber,

I know you hate me and abhor doing any of the assignments typed up on my face, but it is definitely lovelier if I had your innocent handwriting scribbled on y sheet than the horrible and scary streaks of blood-red ink that your teacher scrawls across my belly. It is so painful to go through the "marking process" when your teacher whines incessantly and complains when you do not do well, or have not put in enough effort to write the words clearly, then she would be scrawling with her hard-handed handwriting, causing stashes and gashes across my nice clean face, originally a clean black and white. Worse still, she stamps these silly prints like that title with the words "try harder" on it. It may be embarrassing for you when your friends see it, but at least you can file me away and do better on the next sheet of homework. Spare a thought for me too! I have to have that imprint stamped on my head for the rest of my life. It is an incredibly tough life being a a homework sheet, you know. So I beg of you dear Amber, if you could do me a favour, please do your best work, so that I can be proud of you too, and proud of being in your folder without the other homework sheets laughing at me. I know you have a kind and compassionate heart.

Your piteous friend,
The English Grammar Book, page 2

Would I have liked to live in ancient Greece?

Obviously not! Firstly, the outfits they wear make them look like morons. There are no computers, televisions, Nintendo DS & Wii, and other electronics. Girls were always looked down on and not allowed to attend school. Girls were also always sold to work as slaves and treated unfairly by boys and men. There are also no luxuries and theme parks in ancient Greece. No ice rinks, no tennis courts, no arcades and no Sentosa! Must be very boring doing chores everyday, sewing and cooking. Well at least look on the bright side, no school! No homework! No teachers telling you what to do! But still, being able to live in Singapore is a very lucky thing, it is clean, safe and has a good prime minister. Besides the kia-suism, I think that Singapore is the best place you could live in.

Just a little poem about best friends

Best Friends

by Adrian Henri

It is susan I talk to not Tracey.

Before that I sat next to Jane:

I used to be best friends with Lynda

But these days I think she's a pain.

Natasha's all right to small doses,

I meet Mandy sometimes in town;

I'm jealous of Annabel's pony

And I don't like Nicola's frown.

I used to go skating with Catherine

Before that I went there with Ruth;

And Kate's so much better at trampoline;

She's a showoff, to tell you the truth.

I think that I'm going off Susan,

She borrowed my comb yesterday;

I think I might sit next to Tracey,

She's my nearly best friend: she's OK.

How to Torture Your Teacher

How to Torture Your Teacher

by Bruce Lansky

Only raise your hand when you want to sharpen your pencil or go to the bathroom. Repeat every ten minutes.

Never raise your hand when you want to answer a question; instead, yell, “Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!” and then, when the teacher calls on you,say, “I forgot what I was going to say.”

Lean your chair back, take off your shoes, and put your feet up on your desk. Act surprised when the teacher puts all four legs of your chair back on the floor.

Drop the eraser end of your pencil on your desk. See how high it will bounce.

Drop your books on the floor. See how loud a noise you can make.

Hold your nose,make a face, and say, “P.U.!”Fan the air away from your face, and point to the kid in front of you.

On the last day of school, lead your classmates in chanting: “No more pencils! No more books! No more teachers’ dirty looks!”
Then, on your way out the door, tell the teacher,“Bet you’re looking forward to summer vacation this year. But I’ll sure miss you. You’re the best teacher I have ever had.”

The End

How to Torture Your Students

How to Torture Your Students

by Jane Pomazal and Bruce Lansky


Start each day with a surprise quiz. Don’t dismiss the class for recess until you have finished the lesson you’re working on. At the end of the day, hand out a huge assignment that’s due the next day.

When a student says, “I have to go to the bathroom,” say, “You should have gone this morning before you left home” or “You’ll have to hold it in; it’s time for the kindergarten to use the bathrooms.”

Never call on students who have their hands up. Only call on students who have no idea what’s going on.

When a student asks you a question, say, “Look up the answer in a book.” Don’t bother to mention the name of the book in which the answer can be found.

When you read, go as fast as you can. Skip a line or two, then ask questions about the passage to see if the students were listening.

When it’s time for the students to read, call on someone who does not have a book.

When you hand out pencils, make sure they are dull and don’t have erasers. When you hand out books, make sure they’re torn and tattered.

When preparing the students fora test, write all the information they'll need to know on the board. Then stand in front of the board so they can’t see what you have written. As soon as you have finished discussing the test information, turn quickly and erase the board.

On the last day of school, handout a surprise final exam. Tell your students if they flunk it, they’ll have to attend summer school—and if they flunk summer school, they’ll have to repeat the grade.Tell them you hope they all flunk because you like them so much and you wish they could be your students again next year.

The End

Stalkers!

Being stuck at home, and not needing to go to school and for tuition is not as good as it seems. Firstly, The teachers will call you every morning and afternoon to ask lame stuff such as may I know what is your daughter's temperature. They are practically stalking us! It is not as if we have swine flu or what. Well there should be some good points too, such as no need to wake up so early for school. I think that is the only good point. Ah well! Why is the society in Singapore so kia-su? It is not like we are criminals that need to be locked up! By the way, Singapore already has 599 swine flu cases! Like Jing Ying says, lets run for our lives! But the problem is, to where? Now almost all the countries have swine flu cases I think. And plus Australia already has around 5000 swine flu cases! I guess it is impossible to prevent swine flu. Sigh*

Jokes

Laughter is contagious!

1. Five months pregnant and ravenous, Sarah decided a second helping of dinner. Of course, as soon as she spooned for more food, her husband had something to say about it. " Remember, I am eating for two," Sarah reminded him. " True," he said. " But how many are you exercising for?"


2. John is a safety- first kind of guy. But while vacationing with his friends, he was talked into going para sailing. He was getting hooked into the parachute when he nervously asked the pilot," How often do you replace the rope?" The pilot helpfully replied," Every time it breaks."


3. As Mary went out of the toilet, she looked rather bemused. Her handbag was considerably heavier than went in, even though she left it in an empty basin while she used the loo. Of course an automatic tap sensor is a new experience for her!

Argh!

Oh no! I can't even go out to shop, play or even eat just because I went to Hong Kong. I can't go for tuition and only can come back to school on Thursday. ( That is the good part) The only place I can go is tennis. Oh yeah and supplementary is suspended! Hurray! And also boo! Did you know that MGS has an extra 1 week of holiday? So lucky! sigh! Life is just so unfair! But the point is.... Singapore already has so many cases of swine flu, like around 365, so what is the difference if you go overseas? You can catch swine flu in Singapore, so why do we have to stay at home for seven days just because we went to another country? Then again, sigh!

Hong kong trip

While it was okay I guess. we went to ocean park and took a cable car to Lantau island although we have been there before. We went with my sisters boyfriend but he only stayed for three days and we stayed for six. On the first day we went to have dinner with my ye ye and aunties. We had pecking duck and it was delicious! I ate like 6 of them. Then we went to the street we always go called women street and I bought some stuff. There is another street we also went to which was called flowers street and I bought 4 sticks of fish ball for only $4. Each stick had 8 fish balls and it was delicious too! blah blah blah...... all the lame stuff is finally over, then we went to ocean park on Saturday. I wanted to go on Monday but my sisters boyfriend would have left so it was extremely crowded. we only went on 4 rides and there were hordes of people so we decided to watch the sea lion show and see the pandas. After that, we went to H&M a shop to shop. Most sections were having 50% off so I bought a jacket, a pair of shorts, flats and two shirts. blah blah blah again and then my sisters boyfriend went home because he had army. Later we took the cable car with my ye ye and his maid as he was wheelchair bound, we could skip the queue. The cable car place was called Ngiong Ping 360. at last we arrived at Lantau island. We walked around and then my sister, the maid and I climbed up 260 steps to reach the Buddha, where we took many photos. My ye ye could not go as there were no lifts and my dad had to take care of him. My mom was slacking and did not want to climb with us. For me it was practically just running up instead of climbing. When I reached the top, they were still halfway through climbing! I had dinner with my father's aunts and one was a scholar and the other is an actress. Impressive right? Days went pass and we went shopping and stuff like that. At last it was time to head home. I am so glad to step on Singapore soil again!

What I hate about June holidays........

• Piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles and piles of HOMEWORK!!!!!

What I like about the June holidays.......

• Much more free time and use of computer and TV.


• Vacations ( I dread! The only place we ever go is HK! I know many of you would DIE to go to HK but let me warn you, it is the WORST place you could ever go to, even worse than going to the toilet!) * I am obviously exaggerating but just to show how horrible it is........ ( If you are wondering since I hate it why do I put it under LIKE, since most of you think that vacations are wonderful, I just decided to put it under LIKE, as not to be the think-vacation-is-horrible person.)


• Much more time to play with my hamster, Obama.


• Watch TV and play computer games without hearing the continuous nagging of my mom!


• Have friends over to play.


• More outings and no EXAMS!!!!!

YIPPEE!!!! EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER!!!! REJOICE, CELEBRATE!!!! SIGH* STILL GOT SA2 AND NOT TO MENTION PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES AND PILES OF HOMEWORK!!!!!! Why do we even live on this horrible place with horrible teachers, horrible homework, and not to mention horrible assessment books! The amount of stress is killing me!! Bye bye world! Whoosh! Piack! ( already committed suicide)

Why Chinese shouldn't have Christian names:

Anne Chang = Dirty (Mandarin)

Anne Chin = Keep Quiet (Mandarin)

Faye Chen = Dusty (Mandarin)

Carl Cheng = Buttock (Hokkien)

Monica Cheng = Touching your buttocks (Hokkien)

Jane Tan = Frying eggs (Mandarin)

Henry Mah = Hate your mum (Mandarin)

Paul Chan = Bankrupt (Mandarin)

Nelson Tan = Bird laying eggs (Mandarin)

Leslie Tong = Rubbish Bin (Mandarin)

Rosie Teng = Screws and nails (Hokkien)

Pete Tsai = Nose droppings (Hokkien)

Macy Koh => Never die before (Cantonese)

Confusing chinese names!

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller : No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!

Operator : You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller : I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.

Operator : I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller : Well.... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one)has involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one)got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.

Operator : Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller : You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator : I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).

Caller : Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!!

The idiot test

1. How many sides does a circle have?
2. Spell your name...
3. What shape is a roosters egg? a) triangular b) Oval c) Circle
4. Why is Mas Selamat 2/3 woman??
5. Why can't the skeleton go to the prom?
6. Which direction would a pineapple drop from the tree? a) Left b) down c) right
7. Why can't PM Lee go out in the morning??
8. A mad person is stuck in a forest, which path can it take to get out?
9. What is the time of coins called??

................................................................................................................

Answers:

1. 2 sides, inside and outside!
2. y.o.u.r. n.a.m.e.
3. Roosters do not lay eggs!
4. Because he is 1/3 man!
5. Because he has nobody!
6. Pineapples do not grow on trees!
7. Because he is PM!
8. The psycho path!
9. Century!

Are you 100% idiotic??

It takes 150 trees for an exam paper! Save the earth! Save the trees! Save paper! Ban exam papers and homework FOREVER!

My favourite places are...............................................................

• My home as there is the computer, TV, comfy sofa and bed, my little hamster, Obama, and not to mention lots and lots of junk food and drinks!
• The SPCA as there are many adorable pets that we can adopt!
• Sentosa as there is the Luge and the nice sandy beaches!
• Cinemas as there are many new exciting movies to watch and the screen is enormous!
• Ice cream shops, any kind as I am a ice cream lover! Especially those with nice, creamy, delicious ice cream covered in chocolate sauce!

Quiz!

OK, relax, clear your mind and ... begin. WELL, MAYBE NOT THAT CLEAR!

1. What do you put in a toaster?
...............................................................................................................

Answer: "bread." If you said "toast," then give up now and go do something else. Try not to hurt yourself. If you said, "bread," go to Question 2.

*******
2. Say "silk" five times. Now spell "silk." What do cows drink?
...............................................................................................................................

Answer: Cows drink water. If you said "milk," please do not attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously over stressed and may even overheat.
It may be that you need to content yourself with reading something more appropriate such as Children's World. If you said "water"
then proceed to question 3.

*******

3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?
................................................................................................................................

Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green bricks," what in the devil are you still doing here reading these questions????? If you said "glass,"
then go on to Question 4.

*********
4. Its twenty years ago, and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany(If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany.)
Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he has time and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of "no man's land" between East Germany and West Germany.
Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany or West Germanyor in "no man's land"?
..............................................................................................................................

Answer: You don't, of course, bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else,
you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be appreciated. If you said, "Don't bury the survivors",
then proceed to the next question.

*********
5. Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine people get on.
In Sweden, two people get off and four get on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In Carmarthen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven. What was the name of the bus driver?
...........................................................................................................................

Answer: Oh, for crying out loud! Don't you remember your own name? It was YOU!!

P.S. Almost every one failed 95% of the questions! How about you??

I think that creativity is inborn. You cannot learn how to be creative as it is a skill that you have in you and not something you can learn. If you don't have it means you don't have it. But then again, there are some exceptions. Sometimes creativity can be learned like a talent. Maybe at first you are not creative, but with perseverance and determination, you can become creative. Like many people say, it can be motivated by others. So from my perspective, either way is possible and never give up hope if you are not creative. It can be nurtured along the way as you grow up.

To me courtesy means to say thank you, excuse me, please and sorry. There are many cases when people don't. For example when you knock into someone, instead of saying sorry, you blame the person and tell them to watch their way rudely. When there is someone blocking your way, instead of saying excuse me, you push and shove the person away. All this can lead to commotion and isn't it much easier to be courteous? Choping tables with tissue paper is okay I guess, but sometimes it does not really work . For someone like me, if I see a pack of tissue paper on the table, I will simply just ignore it and sit on the table. The pack of tissue paper could be anyones. It could be the people who were sitting there before. I wonder why people do not seat on the seats choped with tissue paper, is there a rule that people obey? If there is, why can't people just obey the law? If you are late, can't you just explain the reason why you were late, before coming you go to your seat. Even if you were admonished by the teacher, it will still be better than when you sneak into class and the teacher finds out. So you must be thinking, if I sneak into class, there is a 1 in 99 chance that the teacher would not notice. But it is a very slight chance, what more the teachers are not that blur to not notice a student that had popped out from nowhere. I think that we should be more courteous so that we can live in a better society.

The march holidays were way too short! I was just watching TV and playing with my hamster and 5 days is over. On Monday, I totally wasted my time going to the Chinese camp. It was SO boring! What more it lasted from 8 in the morning to 6.30 at night. What a total waste of time! The rest of the days I was just rushing through my piles homework, but on Sunday I went to the Zoo because I was stressed out. When I first reached the Zoo, I felt kind of retarded because the people going there were either adults or small toddlers. But when I saw that my sister was perfectly fine, I did not feel that retarded anymore. The zoo trip was okay, but super tiring. The tram ride was very expensive, so my mum thought of a "brilliant" idea, and made us walk for the WHOLE trip. You must be thinking that I am crazy. I bought a bottle filled with fresh carrots and Veggies which cost $2, just to feed the smelly and fat goats. I did not know what was on my mind! Sigh* I wish the holidays were much longer!

No no no! Of course you cannot love an object more than your family. It is very selfish to do so. Your family is the one that you can lean on when you are in need. Your family is the one that you can trust. You can easily buy an object, even if it is a 10- carat diamond ring. But you can never buy your family. If you have ever gave up your family because of an object, you should really think about it. Your family is your flesh and blood, someone that is loving and caring. An object cannot share and care for you, neither can it love you. You can only admire an object, but you can love your family. So that is why I think that you cannot love an object more than your family.

My wishes and dreams:)

I wish that one day..........

• we would be able to take the lift in school anytime we liked, and don't need to climb 14 flights of stairs everyday!


• I could visit the seven wonders of the world and experience snow.


• Parents were brainwashed and begin acting over friendly and asked us not to do our homework, instead ordered us to go and play with our friends, or they will reprimand us!


• school will close down due to the recession and there will be no homework, assessment books and unreasonable teachers, and we will be able to watch TV and play computer games the WHOLE day.

Sigh* why do we always have to come back to reality!:(

P5 camp rocks!!

P5 camp was awesome! Everything was nice except for the horrible food, toilets and beds.The food was so horrible that I threw away practicly the whole thing. The only thing that was nice was the chicken wings, but we were only allowed to have one! The drinks were diluted and tasted like water. The beds were very cramed and hard. Luckily I brought a pillow and could sleep well at night. The toilets were the worst. It was so smelly, and the locks couldn't work! We had very little time to bathe, and once we went in, the girls will start banging on the doors, asking us to hurry up when we are already trying our best! The crc, abseiling, and the rock climbing were the best! They were so fun! The campfire rocked! There was so much noise, and most of the performaces were wonderful. But the last day of camp was horrible! We had to clean the boys a-huts, and they stinked! There were so much litter and rubbish on the beds and floors! The camp was great!:)

Stress is driving us to our graves!!!

Yes, I agree that kids these day are experiencing more stress. I have to cope with schoolwork as well as tuition work, not to mention multiple activities outside. I think the education system should focus less on distinctions so that students won't feel so pressured.

The Battle Box

The battle box was quite interesting and meaningful. I have learnt what the battle box was used for and have seen many spooky rooms and dungeons. It was a good experience for me, and I enjoyed it very much.

My hobbies:)

My favourite hobbies are ice skating, playing tennis, playing and talking with friends, watching tv and lazing around:)